Three Obstacles to Pastoring and Caring for the Flock
Example: An attitude that basically says, “It’s none of your business,” or “It’s my problem and I’ll deal with it may way.”
Analysis: The result is that people are islands of festering wounds. They are isolated, diseased, and malnourished. Thus, most pastoral care is crisis oriented. Pastors and elders are not called in to help (or do not engage [too passive]) until the crisis is well developed
- Get off the crisis/counseling treadmill.
- Preventative Counseling: 6 months check ups.
- Spiritual Inventory tool.
2. Cultural Egalitarianism
Example: “Nobody can tell me.”
Analysis: The self as the sovereign over the universe. This can be in the form of unresponsiveness to counsel from any source; the young not wanting to receive counsel from the old, old not wanting to receive counsel from the young, experience to inexperienced. “I will be sovereign,” mindset.
- Pray for their humiliation.
- Patient instruction (2 Tim. 4:2b).
- Consistent loving confrontation.
3. Our Therapeutic Culture
Examples: “My therapist says;” or “Doctor Dobson says”; “Minereth/Meyer says”; or “Steve Arterburn, says” or “Promise Keeper’s” or “codependency theory says” or “My AA sponsor says” or “The Big Book says” or “Henry says I need to set up Boundaries in my life,” or “pastor so and so (their favorite radio or TV preacher) says” etc.
Analysis: People who are bound up in this problem are living from within a worldview and language that seems plausible to them but is rarely grounded thoroughly in the word of God. They use a kind of code language that justifies bad behavior in light of their past, their experience, their pain, their genes, their parents, etc.
- Pray for seeing eyes and trusting hearts.
- A theology of suffering.
- Remember, all their lives people have been told by their culture, their schools and their own sinful hearts that “the problem” is “out there” rather than within their own hearts. This has led them to the mistaken notion that a change of situation or association is going to solve their problem. They are quick to run. (This is not to deny that all of those things, [culture, bullies, abusers, family, sins against them by others] play their part in effecting behavior and thought but to put them all in a more balanced place.)
- The reality is that, “Not every problem admits to an engineering solution.” (Ken Meyers)
 Stimulated by the 2000 and 2001 Bethlehem Conferences for Pastors.