Day 1
It was a January day in my freshman year at the University of Maryland. I’ll not go into a lot of detail because I don’t in any way want to glorify sin. Just short of my 19th birthday, I was contemplating suicide. My life seemed to be circling the drain of a cesspool of my own making. I was broken, defeated, keenly aware of my sin and saw no way forward. Fortunately, by the grace of God, I survived that night.
Day 2
In between classes the next day, I visited the Maryland Book Exchange and found my way to the discount bin of mostly forgotten vinyl records. My fingers flipped through the albums until a cover and title caused me to stop. It was a album by Ian Matthews, titled, “IF YOU SAW THROUGH MY EYES.” The album cover arrested my attention for two reason. It had a melancholy vibe to it the picture of Ian Matthews looked surprisingly like me at the time. The title song, happened to be the last song on the album and, I had no way of knowing when I purchased it, was a prayer. The lyrics follow:
Lord above us, hear my song
Tell me if I’m doing wrong
I’m just a man, I’m not like you
If you saw thro’ my eyes, what would you do?
A simple life, that’s what I feel
To want to sing – it’s not unreal
So Lord in heaven, let me know
If you saw thro’ my eyes, where would you go?
I take the blame for where I’ve been
On all the ones I’ve had to leave
And now I’ve shared it all with you
And if you saw thro’ my eyes, what would you do?
On day 2, I prayed that prayer in the afternoon. That evening, Ken Frech, a fraternity brother, shared the gospel with me. I didn’t understand it but I saw something in Ken and heard something in his message and so I invited him to my room to talk the next day.
Day 3
Ken knocked on my door the next day, and took another go at explaining the gospel to me. God gave grace. I repented of my lifestyle and sin, believed the gospel and my life has never been the same. Jesus rescued me to Himself and I have no regrets and all the joy of a life guided by the hand of God.
“Thank you Lord!”
If you seek His face, God will hear your prayer.
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